I wish
by MirandaPasz
Summary: He wishes for her everyday. YuuWata implied as more of a mother/son relationship.


**Please read first! A/N: This is my first xxxHolic fic. Just popped into my head while I was -still- mourning over Yuuko's death. I don't know everything about CLAMPS world, so if there are any mistakes in information I apologize. Also, I don't have a beta so if there are any grammatical errors -which there are probably plenty of- I apologize for that as well.**

**Disclaimer: I unfortunately do not own any of the characters or places in this story. All belongs to CLAMP.**

A haze of smoke hung thickly in the air as the owner of the shop lounged on the sofa, his legs only half covered by his kimono dangling off of the edge. No noise occupied the living room except for the soft inhale and exhale of his lips on a long red pipe. The man's eyes sauntered lazily across the room, looking for patterns in the smoke as a child looks for patterns in the clouds.

_You're here because this is inevitable. You came here to inquire about something..._

Her voice resonated clearly in his mind as though she was only a few feet away. He closed his eyes in pain. Everyday he relived another memory, another dull ache in his chest that lingered and throbbed with every flash of her face and sound of her voice that echoed through his mind. Yes, on the day he'd met her the room looked and felt very much like this. Only now it was missing its most important component.

_May I see the object in your pocket...?_

He reopened his eyes and grabbed the pocket watch off of the stand next to him. His fingers traced the design on the front and the aching grew stronger. He remembered how angry he'd been when she'd taken it for her own, but now he wished more than anything it didn't belong to him; he wished that he hadn't inherited it back. Why couldn't she have just taken all of her stuff with her so he wouldn't have to be reminded with every turn of his head? Why couldn't she have left him with nothing at all? Not even the shop?

He wanted to _die_.

But he made a promise to her. A promise to keep on living. At the time it seemed like a reasonable request, but with every passing day he found himself wishing that she had wished for something else. He didn't want to keep on living without her; his life no longer had meaning. He listlessly granted various wishes of customers, but never left the shop. And even the customers were becoming fewer and fewer with every passing year. But still he waited.

In the beginning he tried to seek her out. He comforted himself in denial by saying things like, "she's Yuuko, she'll find a way back" and "Maru and Moro wouldn't be here if she was really gone. They're a part of her." But after decades of searching, questioning and contemplating he'd grown to accept the fact that she was really truly gone. The only place his former employer anymore resided was in his dreams and memories.

_Any dream can become reality if you strongly wish for it..._

"Shut up!" He yelled into the emptiness. He chucked the silver watch across the room and it hit the wall with a satisfying crack. "I have wished, Yuuko! I've wished for you harder than I've wished for anything in my life!" Tears spilled over the edges of his eyes and he furiously wiped them away with his sleeve. He was almost glad she wasn't here to see him crying. She'd call him a crybaby and order him to serve her another bottle of sake.

_You already drank it all!? Watanuki asked exasperated._

_Be a good boy and fill it back up._

A small smile spread over Watanuki's face as he reminisced. Yuuko's drinking habits never failed to shock anyone who witnessed them, except for Mokona of course. The shop owner's smile faltered. Mokona. As annoying as the ball of fur could be, Watanuki wished Mokona was here now. After Syaoran and the others were finished with their business at Clow country there was no longer a need for the Monkonas, and they had ceased to exist.

The shop owner sighed. The stinging of his eyes told him it was late. He stood and crossed the room to place his pipe back on it's stand before heading down the hall to check on Maru and Moro in their bedroom. The girls had become accustomed to no longer having their mistress around, but even so he tried to keep them occupied, giving them easy but lengthy tasks and spending as much time playing with them as possible. But he worried when he was with customers. They'd never been on their own for more than one night so he always avoided accepting wishes that would keep him away from the shop in his sleep for too long. He smiled at the two sleeping girls, tangled up together as if their lives depended on each other. He supposed they did. After one last glance, the shop owner quietly padded down the hall to his own room. He removed his glasses, slipped into his bedclothes and sank into satin sheets. It was another night of dreams and memories that would plague his tormented mind.

"Oh well," he muttered, "the sooner I get to sleep the sooner it'll be over I suppose."

OoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_"Wa-tanu-ki!"_

_"I am trying to prepare you a three course meal, Yuuko! I can't come do whatever it is you want because your fish fin will burn! Really, does no one have respect for a chef anymore?" Watanuki snapped as he stirred the soup in the pot next to the fish._

_"Goodness Watanuki, I just wanted to know if it was ready yet." The raven haired shop owner replied, and he could hear the pout in her voice._

_"Yeah, well, it will be ready when it's ready. Don't rush me!"_

_A heavy thud came from outside the kitchen that sounded like a body hitting the floor. Watanuki paused. "Yuuko?"_

_There was no reply._

_Watanuki turned off the burner and crossed into the hall toward the living room. "Yuuko, are you okay in there...?"_

_CRASH!_

Watanuki bolted upright in bed, a thin sheen of sweat covering his body. He grabbed his glasses and scanned his room, looking for whatever had caused all of the noise. "Must have just been in my dream." he murmured with relief.

_Thud!_

Watanuki's head snapped to the door so quickly it might have fallen off. It's coming from the hallway, maybe it's Maru and Moro? But the hairs all over his body stood on end. Whatever was in the hallway was disturbing the aura of the shop. Maru and Moro wouldn't send his senses into the panic they were currently in. Carefully, so as not to make any noise, the shop owner slipped out of bed and tiptoed to the doorway and slowly crept into the hall. The moonlight shone through the window and landed on a crouched figure, half slumped over the mini hutch along the wall.

The shop owner's eyes widened. "Yuuko...?" He whispered, barely audible. The woman lifted her head, black hair falling out of her ruby colored eyes which were brimmed with tears. "Watanuki." she murmured back.

That was all it took before he threw himself at her, clutching at her kimono as though if he let go he would fall off the face of the Earth. He felt her wince at the force of him but he couldn't back away. He needed her. Tears streamed freely down his face, but he didn't care. She was here with him again and he was never going to let her go. He inhaled deeply, allowing the scent of her to fill him up to the brim. Not one day had passed that he didn't long for her smell. It had been years since it had faded off of her belongings she'd left behind. Her arms wrapped delicately but firmly around him, holding him close. He sobbed her name over and over into her neck as if saying it out loud would materialize her even more.

How long they stayed like that, he didn't know. It felt like days but it could have been only minutes. Finally, the witch pulled back from him, running her fingers through his hair, and he looked up at her. Her face was ashen pale, different from the porcelain pale it used to be, and there were deep circles under her eyes. She seemed so... delicate.

"Yuuko, I'm..." sorry he meant to say, but the words wouldn't come out. It was as if looking at her had lost him the ability to form more than a couple words at a time.

She smiled at him but there was a deep exhaustion in her eyes. "I'm alright, Watanuki. I just need to rest."

OoOoOoOoOoOo

Watanuki stayed with Yuuko for the night. He was almost embarrassed to ask, but he didn't want to leave her alone in fear that he might wake to find her gone again. When he asked, her lips spread into a smirk before allowing him to stay, which only made his face a brighter shade of red than it already was. It made him happy though, to see something that reminded him of how she used to be. He scooted as close to the edge of his side of the bed as possible, not wanting to cross any boundaries, only to feel Yuuko's smooth arm wrap around his middle and pull him back against her. It took him a moment, but Watanuki relaxed into her embrace and allowed himself to be cuddled like a child. He felt her smile against his hair. "Goodnight Watanuki..." she whispered sleepily.

"Welcome home, Yuuko."

**Okie dokie, so the second chapter isn't really a second chapter. This is still a one-shot, I just decided to write a second ending that I enjoyed just as much as this happy one! Check it out!**


End file.
